Episode 165: Working with Friends and Family
Working with friends and family in real estate can be both rewarding and challenging. The key to success? Keep it professional with people you know. From getting them to choose you as their agent to managing the transaction with clear communication and boundaries, professionalism is the only way to avoid hurt feelings and awkward situations.
Should You Expect Their Business?
Many new agents assume that friends and family will automatically work with them. But that’s not always the case. People may already have an established relationship with another agent, or they might not feel comfortable mixing business and personal life. Instead of assuming, ask to be considered. Approach it like a job interview—offer your services professionally and without pressure.
Don’t Take It Personally
When someone you know chooses another agent, it can feel like rejection. But more often than not, it’s not about you. They may have acted quickly, gotten swept up in a high-pressure sales moment, or just weren’t ready to deal with the emotions of working with a friend. Give them grace and use these situations as learning opportunities. You may even get the call when they’re ready to sell down the road.
Keep It Professional with People You Know
Even when a friend or relative does choose to work with you, it’s critical to treat them like any other client. Use your systems. Deliver the same level of service. Run your consultations, emails, and follow-ups as you normally would. When you stick to your process, everyone benefits from a smooth, professional experience—and it’s easier to separate work from your personal relationship.
Set Boundaries (Without Being Rigid)
Your boundaries are there to protect your time and energy, but don’t turn them into walls. Friends and family might text you at off hours or expect casual updates. It’s okay to respond kindly and let them know you’ll get back to them during business hours. A quick “I’ll check in the morning and get back to you” can maintain both your professionalism and your relationships.
Be Honest About Fit
Some friends or family members just won’t be a good fit for you—due to location, price point, or expectations. It’s okay to say no if it’s not a transaction you can confidently manage. You can refer them to a trusted agent in the area, and your honesty will protect the relationship and your reputation.
How to Stay Top of Mind (Without Being Pushy)
To gently remind friends and family that you’re in real estate:
- Offer to create a CMA just for practice.
- Ask them for vendor referrals to build your list.
- Ask about their past experiences with other agents—what they liked or didn’t like.
This creates natural, non-salesy opportunities to talk about your work.
Let Your Systems Do the Heavy Lifting
The best way to stay professional, even with the people you know, is to lean on your systems. Whether it’s email templates, checklists, or client intake forms, your systems help you stay consistent and organized—so you don’t drop the ball or blur the lines between personal and professional.
Not Everyone Will Be a Referrer
Even if someone works with you and has a great experience, they may not naturally refer you. Some people just don’t think that way. But others—like those close friends and family members who do become your cheerleaders—can be amazing advocates for your business. Keep showing up, keep serving well, and keep it professional with people you know.
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