With the holidays right around the corner, it’s the perfect time to revisit the ever-challenging topic of boundaries—especially when your schedule feels maxed out. In this episode, we dive deep into finding the balance between capacity and demand as business heats up and life gets even busier. We share one listener’s personal struggle with managing her calendar, especially when new clients throw off her well-laid plans (we’ve all been there, right?).

We’ll explore the concept of capacity vs. demand, a lesson borrowed from physical therapy that translates perfectly to real estate. Your capacity is how much you can handle before hitting burnout, while demand covers everything from client needs to family responsibilities. The key takeaway? If you want to handle a busier season without losing your sanity, you’ve got to increase your capacity—whether that’s by adding systems, streamlining processes, or getting help.

Plus, hear how Alissa found her own capacity sweet spot and tips for differentiating between real demands and the ones we create in our minds. Get ready to set some boundaries and approach this holiday season with more clarity and calm!

Tune in, take a breath, and let’s tackle this together! 💪

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The following is a rough transcript provided by Otter.ai.
Alissa 0:02
You have to be careful because you don’t want to vent constantly. No, because then you’re stuck in the muck like you don’t want to get get there. Well,

Katy 0:09
what you focus on grows.

Alissa 0:10
Yes,

Katy 0:13
the data shows that in an election year, the market gets quiet and following the election, regardless of how it goes. If market picks back up,

Alissa 0:24
yeah, I could fire him, but like then I lose two and I wasn’t at that point I wanted to recoup. Hi, y’all welcome to hustle. Humbly, it’s Alyssa and Katie, and we are two top producing realtors in the Baton Rouge market. We

Katy 0:39
work for two different companies where we should be competitors, but we have chosen community over competition.

Alissa 0:44
The goal of our podcast is to encourage you to find your own way in business. So stop comparing

Katy 0:48
yourself and start embracing your strengths.

Alissa 0:52
Hello, Alyssa. Hey, Katie, welcome. Yes, it’s

Katy 0:54
November 11. You know what that means? It’s 1111. Oh, nice. Make a wish. Oh, make a wish for boundaries.

Alissa 1:03
We thought it would be good before we get into the holidays to do a little boundaries revisit. A

Katy 1:08
little boundaries revisit. And we’re going to talk about another concept that I’ve been stewing on, and we’ve talked about a little bit personally, so we’ll add that in as well. Do you want to tell them what it is you want me to tell them what it is already? Yes, it’s capacity versus demand. Yeah, but we’ll come back to it. Okay, okay, so what your capacity is versus the demand? Let’s read this message from Kristen to start us off. Okay, great, okay. Kristen said, I am currently managing a team, my husband and myself the hardest. That’s the hardest team, the hardest team. I am struggling with boundaries. My calendar is always set, but I feel all over the place, especially after we get a new buyer, it just throws everything off any suggestions.

Alissa 1:50
It’s tough. Like, especially when you’re working with family, you know, we’ve talked to some of our listeners that have it’s like, not only do you have to implement boundaries with your clients, yeah, but in your house with what you chat about, right, right, even us on on podcast day, our conversation just naturally goes to what’s going on in our transactions. Help me write this email? Yeah? Like, yeah, we

Katy 2:16
had to delay recording so I could help you write a text. I

Alissa 2:20
know. I know. So, yeah, I think that’s it’s especially hard when you’re working together, yeah,

Katy 2:27
and I like though what she was saying, because this is very much a problem I have if you have in your mind how your day is going to go, and then a new buyer pops up, or some problem arises, and it throws off the rhythm of your day, or what you had planned or how you pictured it to be. Sometimes the mental load of trying to re navigate, it can be like, Oh, everything is ruined. Yes, you know. So it’s like, how do you how do you gracefully accept the fact that where you work in a business where things are not always how you plan them to be, yeah?

Alissa 3:01
And I feel like the more times I sit on a panel of top producing agents, yeah, I and they talk about all their time blocking and all of their non negotiable standing personal appointments, right, my mind is just blown, because I know how unrealistic of an expectation that is to set to the crowd that’s listening, yeah, and then it makes them feel like, well, I canceled my door knocking or my phone call appointment because I got this new buyer that needed to see a house at this time, And now I feel like a failure because I compromised on my schedule, right on my non on my on my time, blocking my calendar was green or orange during this time, and that’s the time I was supposed to do this, right? But I applaud this person, yeah, because that’s actually our job. You know, there’s so many things that we feel like we’re supposed to do as agents, right? And at the end of the day, all we do is work with buyers and work with sellers. It’s just that simple. If you got into real estate to be your air quotes, own boss, right? You’re in for a rude awakening, right? Because at the moment, I have like, 12 bosses, right, right? I have five sellers. Half of them are happy with me. Half of them are not. I have a few buyers. Half of them are happy. Half of them are frustrated with the inventory. But all of these people are your boss. Are my boss? They can

Katy 4:43
throw off your schedule at any point in time. Yeah. They can say, hey, I can talk to you at 10, even though you have plans to do something else

Alissa 4:50
at 10, yeah. And sometimes, right, yeah, sometimes, you mean 10am like, just now, right? Like, just now. I’m using just now, not 10 people at a time, but you’re gonna. Core, and you’re like, Hold

Katy 5:00
on, I have to talk to this seller. We were

Alissa 5:03
going to record this episode at 10am it was on the agenda, right or No, at 930 Yeah. And then my seller, we got an offer on her house last night, and she was like, Hey, I’m in meetings. Can I call you at 10am and I was like, Katie, I we have to fine. Good news, I’m

Katy 5:16
very flexible, but within the like, I just have to get this certain number of things done during a large time frame, right? Yeah, if you get too strict about I must have this done at this time, and your client needs something, you’re going to feel consistent resistance, right? Yeah, like I am feeling like I’m not doing what I want to be doing. So and in our in our episode about time blocking, like, I think it’s called, does time blocking work for real estate. I don’t remember the number, but we talk a lot about that episode, how you need to get certain things done as an agent, as a business owner, but they need to be more flexible in where you do them, yeah, because your client’s needs will come first. Typically, that doesn’t mean your client’s needs are ever your problem at 10pm No, but it does mean that in the course of your day, it may throw off what you had planned. But we’ve also talked about I black off personal things just the same as I would a regular appointment with the with the client. Yeah, so if I have to be at school from nine to 10 for presentation from the kids class. It’s an appointment in my calendar, and if someone needs something else, I’m like, I’m sorry, I have an appointment at that time. Yes, I can get back to you at 10. It’s not the end of the world, right? So I think Kristen, you

Alissa 6:38
got this. Yeah, you do. And I like you said, the clients take priority. Yeah, that is the bread and butter of what we do. Yeah. Everything else we do is to work to get clients. Works to get clients. We just want the client. Yeah, we just want the client. So if you have something else that is, you know, phone calls to get more clients, but you have a client that wants to see a house that takes priority? Yeah, if it’s something that you can’t cancel, that’s okay. There’s other hours in the day. Hey, I can’t go at 9am could we go at 11 or one or three? I give options? Yeah, I always like to give several options, and I’ve been doing that more and more lately, and it’s been going pretty well. Like when a new buyer sends me a house. Hey, we like this. What are your thoughts? First thing I do check the property disclosure. Hey, just want to let you know the roof is 14 years old. It is a two story. I see that only the primary is downstairs and three of the bedrooms are upstairs. I know that you had mentioned in the past that could be an issue with the kids. If you want to see it. I can go Wednesday at this time, Thursday at this time, or Friday at this time. And sometimes they’re like, Hey, thanks for that info. We just don’t think it’s the house for us, right? And sometimes they’re like, great, Thursday at one right? Do

Katy 7:51
the good leg work before you show up. And they’re like, oh yeah, this

Alissa 7:55
is two stories, right? Yeah, we didn’t go. We didn’t know all the bedrooms were upstairs. Like,

Katy 8:00
you could have saved yourself a trip, Yep, yeah, smart and just being prepared for I think it’s a mindset issue. It is. Are you flexible? Do you understand what this job actually is? You don’t get to just choose your schedule to the last every last minute, right? Sorry, you just don’t. No, it’s not. This is a flexible schedule in a way, but in another way, you have no control. Like, yes,

Alissa 8:27
it’s, it’s so weird. You know, every job, and I think every job, has something that appears to be greener grasses right on the other side, always, what I love about this job is, yes, I have to be sort of on call at any given moment, but I can take as much vacation as I want. Yeah, I do have to make a lot of plans to take that vacation and have people here for showings. Yeah? But, you know, I just got back from my scuba diving trip, and it was glorious. Things were fine. Yeah, I checked my email once a day. Just kind of peeked in there. Nothing was ever on fire. I did have a buyer that needed to see some houses. I had a colleague here that was so delightful and helped out.

Katy 9:15
Did you pay them for the showings?

Alissa 9:19
I did. Okay. I paid them for the showings. I actually wrote an offer in Cozumel that did not get accepted, yeah, and then when I came home, we went and looked at the house together. It was still on the market, and we resubmitted an offer after I looked at it, and now we’re under contract. I love it, yeah, but it’s like, worked out it really is a perspective thing. You know, what’s so funny, speaking of perspective, and I’m gonna share it on our Instagram this week. Oh, I can’t wait. Before we landed in Cozumel, I took a picture out the plane. Yeah, it was beautiful. The most beautiful picture you’ve ever seen. Yeah, the. Three minutes later, we were landed Okay, on the ground. Took the same picture, like, literally, like a six or less than 10 minute difference out the window, totally Gray, raining, oh, because

Katy 10:13
you were in the air yes versus on the ground, yes, yeah, and

Alissa 10:19
not to be all you know, please, whatever. But it was, like, such a revelation of, oh, my like, how are you looking at things? Yeah, they

Katy 10:27
always tell you, you have to get that 30,000 foot perspective of your life, of your business, of whatever. Like, you’re getting bogged down in the details, but, like, the big overview, is it good? Is

Alissa 10:39
it bad? Like you were like, this is beautiful, yeah. And then we landed, and I was like, Oh, this

Katy 10:43
is a great day. Yeah. I

Alissa 10:45
thought it was gonna be beautiful today, and it’s raining. That’s so funny. And not only was it raining, but in Cozumel, you have to get off the plane in the on the concrete, on the tarmac, on the tarmac, yes, and then you walk to where you have to go. So we were getting like rain, like, this is not how I presented it on Instagram. That’s true too.

Katy 11:08
I only shared the pretty picture. I mean, that story was the truth. Both things were true. Both were true. We say that all both things are true, yeah, oh my gosh. Funny. Okay, let’s, let’s go into, we’re going to get to the holidays part of this, because we want to talk about boundaries in reference to holidays. But let’s back it up, and let’s do talk about capacity versus demand. Yeah. Okay, so the first time I ever heard this theory, if you will, was during my physical therapy, like six, I think it was six or eight weeks my physical therapy that I did after my back surgery. So that was in April of, like, May of 2022, when I was done with the part where you can’t even move, like, after back start, like, Don’t bend down. So you just walk around with your brace on, and you’re just like, oh my god, don’t bend down. Don’t be okay. But then when you’re like, into now it’s time for therapy. Let’s get our strength back and fix our core and all this stuff. The therapist told me, you know, we have to work on your capacity versus your demand. So what your body? And I’m gonna give you the physical description of this, and then I’ll give you kind of like the business description capacity. The actual definition of capacity is the maximum amount that something can contain. So it’s the maximum amount of some that what you can handle. And this definition she’s giving me, your capacity is what your body can handle. So right after surgery, my body is weak. I’m trying to heal my back like, I can’t handle. I can’t go, like, power lifting, right? I can’t care,

Alissa 12:37
actually, had a very strict weight limit, right? Yes,

Katy 12:41
I can’t go carrying around a toddler or lifting up the groceries or whatever. My capacity is low. Now demand is, and this is the definition, is an insistent request made as if by right? So a demand on you is something that you’re required to do.

Alissa 12:58
Just hearing that definition makes me, like, pull back, right? You’re like, I don’t want people to make demands on me. And they think that it’s their right to do that, right? Like, it’s

Katy 13:07
like a hostage negotiation, like they’re the the hostage takers are giving demands. Like, I you’re gonna have to Okay, so your capacity is what you can handle. And again, if we’re looking at this physically, but if we’re looking at it mentally or in your business, your capacity is, what is your burnout or breaking point? Like, what is the point at which your mental, mental and physical health suffer? Yeah, so capacity, you can get all the way up to this point. That’s your capacity. And then there’s a tipping point and you’re like, I’m not okay, yeah, for whatever, however it affects you, right? Okay, and then demand is anything that’s being insisted of you. So literally anything in your life, your clients calling you at any hour, you know, if they’re not a nice client, this is a higher demand, right? The mean, your kids need to see you. You have to help your elderly parents. You need to take care of buying all the Christmas gifts. You have to a baby who eats all night long, and you have to get up, you know, every two hours. These are all demands. You can’t really control your demands. If you get sick, that is a demand on you, like you. You just can’t operate at the same capacity, right, right? Okay, so all of these things are demands on you. So she said, what we’re going to do in therapy is we’re going to increase your capacity so that when you have more demands, you can handle them without getting to your breaking point. And I was like, I was like, hold up. This is like, such a My mind is blown, yeah. Like you have the option and ability to increase your capacity. And I was like, Oh, my God. Never thought about it. Never thought about that way. I never thought about the fact that I can’t control the demands on me. Like, I can’t control how much my kids need me. I can’t control, like, you know, all of these certain things in my life. How. My business needs me, but I can control my capacity for those things. Yeah, okay, so let’s talk a little bit about handling more demands. So like, let’s just say you’re in a busier season of your business or your life. How can we increase our capacity? And then I’ll ask you, if you can think of some ways to increase your capacity, systems. Can help create increase your capacity. Do I already have my buyer and seller folders ready? Well, then I’m not going to freak out if I get a new listing call, right? It doesn’t matter that I have 10 transactions and all the balls in the air. I’m like, Well, I can grab the folder and I can go in 20 minutes and be ready to go. Maybe, if you have an assistant. That’s how you increase your capacity. People are always talking about leverage, right? Like, how can we use our tools to give us more space to do what we need to do, or what’s being demanded of us? Email Templates, high increase in your capacity, right? Because now you’re getting all this communication done on the front end, even if you had a standard closing gift and you’ve got four in your closet and you’re not having to run last minute and take care of these things, those, to me, are ways to increase your capacity. Yeah, do you have some ideas for how to increase your business capacity?

Alissa 16:17
I feel like I need advice on it this this year,

Katy 16:21
I think also, you do a good job of relaying your business like your buyer rules and your business hours, and if you put those things into place, it increases your capacity, because you’re not getting those extra demands.

Alissa 16:34
Yeah, I have to check myself on my emotional capacity, yeah, which is a little bit harder to measure, but I struggle the most when a client is unhappy, yeah, when a house is not selling, right? When a buyer can’t find what they’re looking for. Or lately, I have a buyer that we’ve been looking and now her whole family is in good looking too, and I’m getting all these messages. That’s like, my aunt heard about this one coming up from a friend, you know. And I stalk this person, and I make a phone call, and they’re like, not even meeting their criteria, no, you know. And it’s just like, but I’m like, just, this is me saying this to myself, like I feel like I’m not doing a good enough job, because they’re finding all of these leads for potential houses in these, you know, miscellaneous areas, and none of them have worked out. No, none of them have worked out. But, you know, there’s things like that that I’m like, I get hard on myself, right? Like, is my buyer working harder than I am? Sometimes they are because sometimes they are on a mission, and depending on their work, they’re at school. Yeah, they’re doing all the so much research. But that is when I get but also, for example, this year 2024 is the first year of my whole career that I felt like I found my limit. Yeah, you were like, This is the tipping point in the past. You’ve always been like, how many listings? Is too many? How many? And I’m like, I never could find that number. And it happened at a time that I wasn’t the busiest, like, I was busy, but I certainly wasn’t the busiest I’ve ever been, yeah? But I had some very difficult clients, right? That were not the kindest, yeah, and I had to even assert. I had to, you know, at first it was hard, and then I had to get to a place of separating myself from what they were making me feel right. One, for instance, you know, was always wanting me to do these crazy things to get their house sold, and wanted me to show up at hospitals with brochures, because there’s hospitals in the area, and it was a high end house, and we needed some doctors

Katy 18:50
like stalk the doctors in the literal hallway of the hospital. He was

Alissa 18:54
suggesting I just it was It caught me so off guard. You were like, wow, that’s very demanding. Very demanding. Yes, very demanding. You were like, I don’t have the capacity. That’s what I was thinking. Like, I don’t have the capacity to do what you’re asking. You need a different agent. And he loved reminding me how much money I was gonna make if the house is money.

Katy 19:18
You’re like, great. You’re right. I don’t obviously, I want to get to the end and make the money, yeah, or else. What was all of this? For sure, but he’s not also pointing out, Hey, by the way, if we don’t sell and I won’t make any of the money, and I have spent all this time, so

Alissa 19:32
I understand, like, I understand that if I don’t sell this house, I don’t get, yeah, you don’t have to remind me of right? That doesn’t mean I’m gonna bring show up at hospitals like a wow sales rep, like, I’m not here to discuss a drug. I am here, which is like a house, yeah, house,

Katy 19:53
because, again, you can’t force someone to buy a house. But the

Alissa 19:56
way that he spoke often to me was very kind. Descending very like, you’re not doing enough, you know. And that took more of a toll on me, yeah, than and it was a long term listing, you know, and I did get it sold.

Katy 20:11
So then you’re like, as new business approaches you, you’re less inclined to want to take it, yeah, because you’re like, I’m sorry, I’m already my dock. It’s full. I’m

Alissa 20:20
already at during this time, I referred out more business than I normally would have, because I was just not in a good place emotionally. Yeah, now it was interesting, because I would get a call and they’d be like, well, we’re looking our budget’s not the best, and this is what we want. I’m like, okay, look, I have someone that’s going to help you, right? It’s not going to be me. I just, I might, I can’t right now, yeah, I’m kind of running on empty here. And I didn’t say that, but I was like, Look, I have an agent that works this area specifically. Yeah, they have more capacity than I do at this moment to do the digging that you need. Right now, if someone called and was like, Hey, this is what I’m looking for. This is what we want. This. We’re on a strict time frame. I’m like, awesome. You’re ready to go? Yeah, we need to find something I can work with this. I know the inventory there. Let’s do it. But I was being way more selective when I was in this place. And then I got to a point where I had to be like, I can’t live like this, so, but I’m not getting rid of the seller, right? So how do I cope? So what did you do? I just Well you were like my therapist during this time, and that was very helpful. Just having you and maybe like my broker to express my frustrations, and y’all both helped me get above Yeah, the situation, I was totally in the class, yeah, I like, it’s a great day. It was a gray day. I couldn’t get the grayness to go away, and it took not vent. Here’s the thing, you have to be careful because you don’t want to vent constantly, no, because then you’re stuck in the muck, yeah? Like you don’t want to get get there. Well, what you focus on grows, yes. And so it was like, Yeah, I could fire him, but like, then I lose two and I wasn’t at that point, I wanted to recoup my, my it did sell, right? It sold. Yeah, okay, good. Um, but it also got to the point where my broker’s like, I mean, you have a contract signed, right? I’m like, yeah. She’s like, he’s not gonna fire you, and if he does, we’ll fight it. I was like, Oh, okay. And she’s like, you know, just tell him, this is what I’m doing. This is my marketing plan. These things that you’re asking me to do were not in my marketing Yeah? And you knew what it was gonna be when you hired me, yeah? And I also got to the point where I said, Listen, I’m not doing anything else until you paint those bedrooms? Yeah, I’m not doing anything else until you fix your landscaping, right? I have done everything you’ve asked of me, and I’m no longer putting now you have to do the work right. And once the fear of losing the client, like worst case scenario, he does want to fire me, and I choose not to fight it, right? Fine,

Katy 23:03
yeah, you did everything you could possibly do to sell it. It still hasn’t sold. And

Alissa 23:06
I had to also be okay with saying, You know what, this is a seller, that even when we get to the closing table, he’s not going to be happy, he’s not going to be happy. You could never make him happy. There is nothing. And once I separated myself, like we’re talking about a dating show. We are, we are, once I separated myself from that goal, yeah, of making him happy, making him happy, and believed that I was a hard worker. I was fine, yeah, that was good. I just started taking his calls, putting him on speaker while I typed my emails. And every now and said, Yeah, I hear you, yes, yes. I just sort of detached. But it took me a minute, you know, like I find myself to be pretty tough, yeah, this one got me. And at the same time, I also had a very difficult one who was reluctant to even use an agent. Reminded me of that the whole time. You know, it was just two at one time that were just really wearing me down. And you saw me during that time, I was like, I have, I just have. I cannot actually process anything else. Yeah,

Katy 24:15
yeah, because you have a, basically a self imposed mental demand. You were saying in your mind, I have to make these clients. I don’t just have to sell these houses. I have to make these clients happy. And that was not a goal that you could ever achieve, ever, ever. Yeah, this makes me think a little bit about other businesses specifically. When you’re like, I had to refer out, you know, I just was spending all my time trying to deal with these difficult clients. When you think about, like, you go to a new doctor, they’re like, Okay, well, the next available appointment for new patients is three months away. Or if you go to, like, even like, my broker does design, it’s like, oh, well, we have a wait list. Like, we don’t have any more space for design work right now, but we’ll have an opening and. Months people wait, yeah, like, it’s just, but realtors are just like, oh, whatever I get I have to grab onto right now, and I have to work it all, because in two months there might be no one, yeah, which actually might be true. It may be that there are more clients right now, and in two months there are not, but you also can’t live your life like that, like, Oh, I’m gonna do 20 transactions right now and zero later. Like, you’re gonna have to figure out what is sort of the median number that you can handle. And

Alissa 25:30
I think that if you have your systems in place, and I think that if you have your systems in place, it levels out naturally. Yeah, there you will. If you have systems in place, good systems, you’re rarely going to get to zero, right? Nothing going on because your systems, your follow up, and the way you chat with your clients and your database like it’s always keeping something trickling in, right? Okay, and I still can’t fully answer the question of, What is my capacity? Yeah, because it’s not a number, I feel like I could handle 30 transactions if the clients are great, yeah. But the second, people are not respecting my boundaries, wanting me to do things I did not agree to from the beginning in the marketing plan, all these things, all of a sudden, it’s like, I’m sorry, yeah. Like, that’s not the limit. This is the limit,

Katy 26:25
right? Because you’ve closed 90 transactions in multiple years, yeah? And then you’re, you even said, you’re like, I can’t handle more right now, and I’m doing a lot less transactions than previously, right? But that one bad seller can feel like 10 100% and that’s the point that I got to where I just needed more

Alissa 26:47
more honestly, like, I napped a lot, right? Because I was just like, I gotta take to, like, go, just lay down for 45 minutes, yeah? And wake up just a little bit with a fresh perspective, yeah? You know. Or I need to go for a run. I was working out a lot during that time, right? You know, I was, I was coping because I was trying to shake it off, I know, because I didn’t want it to spill over into my kids, or, you know, my house, and then people, what’s wrong, you know, like, poor Tanner, it’s like, he’s like, How was work? And I’m like, he’s like, What? Like? He’s not used to that, you know, but it happened, I’m

Katy 27:24
sorry I asked, yeah,

Alissa 27:25
but he was, he was great, you know? I was like, I was, it’s just hard, right now, right? But even he was like, I’ve never seen you like this. And I was like, I’m emotionally not, right? That’s where I’m struggling, yeah, you know, yeah. So real estate is so hard to gage boundaries because so many of them are ambiguous, like, it’s not this concrete number of, Oh well, I have 10 listings right now, so you’re gonna have to wait till one sells and then I can take another. It’s

Katy 27:55
very funny. You should say that, though, for most of my career, it didn’t ever come to the point where I got look. I typically would have five listings at any given time. I would have about five listings, and if another listing came along, I wasn’t going to turn it away, because I never was like at my capacity for transactions. But I did at most of my listing appointments, say, Hey, I have about five listings at any given time, that’s what I feel like I can appropriately serve and give all of my attention to everyone that needs it. You may interview other agents who will say, I have 50 listings right now that, to me, is not what I could handle and give the appropriate attention. So it’s up to you. If you want someone who is doing a high volume, are you just a number? Then, like, right? I’m telling you what I know I can do and give good service, and I think that if we all think that way, you can maybe stay at your below your capacity, right? Yeah, I’ve

Alissa 28:53
even had clients that I interviewed for that did not choose me because I had too many, too many they felt like I had too many transactions going on. Yeah, that was fine. That’s a fair and I was at a place where I felt like I could handle them, yeah? And I told them that, but they were like, no. But they were like, no. We just, you know, I don’t feel like the only one, yeah, yeah. I

Katy 29:14
mean, that’s just what their need was, right? Um, okay, I think some people listening are probably like boundaries. Why do I need boundaries? I don’t need business because it’s kind of slow right now. Yeah, now, as this airs, I’m so curious to see what will happen, because regardless of the outcome, the data shows that in an election year, the market gets quiet and following the election, regardless of how it goes, it market picks back up, right? So we’re a week out. Like, are people, like, starting to come out yet, or are they like, I’ll wait until after Christmas? Like, what’s happening? Yeah, I know that they’re the people who are like, boundaries. I don’t again, I don’t need the boundaries for the holidays. What are some of. Things You do as a working agent to give yourself boundaries during the holidays, like, do you have to change anything?

Alissa 30:07
I love the major holidays, like Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, Mother’s Day, because I feel like it’s the only day that it would actually be appropriate to keep my phone on airplane mode. You’re like, I’m not here, yeah. Like, I just believe that, like, anybody who needs something, I can check it after, and if they don’t get a response from me, they’re like, Oh, it is Christmas Day, right, you know? So I do appreciate the major holidays, because, like, if I’m on vacation, I do feel the need to check in with my business because those are just regular business days, yeah. And it helps me enjoy my vacation, because I’m like, Oh, look, everything’s going well, oh, this person needs something. Here you go. Here’s my colleague. You know, it’s crazy, but on actual the days of I’m like, that’s really nice, like, I can just not do that. I don’t feel the need to do that. But also with the holidays coming up, you know, I’m Haven’s room mom, right? I’ve noticed this is a lot of work. It is a good bit of work. But Haven just thinks it’s so cool that I’m so cool. In her class, a lot, all her friends are like, hi, Haven’s mom, you know, precious. So it’s just been, it’s been nice. And while it is a lot of work, it’s not too long. No, she

Katy 31:22
has second grade, right? Yeah,

Alissa 31:24
she’s in second grade. I

Katy 31:25
was ainsley’s room, mom in the second grade. Oh,

Alissa 31:27
and never again. You didn’t enjoy it.

Katy 31:30
I loved it. My mom was always the room, mom. But I also had to do some mental like unpacking of this. Like, I grew up with a mom who was always the room mom and the head of the room, moms, oh, and like, she was stay at home, mom,

Alissa 31:46
I see that’s different. It is different. I

Katy 31:49
can’t expect myself to be able to handle that and a full time business, yeah? Like, if I could, I can, but I had fun. It was fine in the second grade, I enjoyed it, yeah, but she wasn’t like, Mom, you have to be at every year. And at school, they try to give different people a turn, yes, so it’s sort of like they want to get new moms to do at the, you know, following years. And I never tried again. But I

Alissa 32:12
think that’s an excellent point, because you’re like, Well, my mom was the room mom, and my mom did all the things. It’s like, yes, but your mom was not working, right? So her job was, yeah, to she had a greater capacity for mom things. She had a greater capacity for mom thing. Yeah, that’s amazing. She

Katy 32:29
didn’t have to split her focus. I was the room mom again in sixth grade. That was very low key.

Alissa 32:33
Yeah, I could see that, but that was it. Yeah, I think that’s an excellent point, though. But like, as things come up, like, I’m sure we’re gonna have Thanksgiving parties and things like that at school. So then you have all these other holiday parties that come up, and family get together, right? And things just get really busy in your personal life, yeah? And I think it’s important that you are offering the time slots to your client, yeah. So as you are getting new clients or clients that need you to come meet them face to face, saying, absolutely, how does your day look? This day at this time, this day at this give three good options, yeah, and if none of them work, re you know, keep going, yeah. But I try my best to avoid. How does your schedule look? No, when can you go? No? Because if they’re like, Well, I can go on this day, it’s like,

Katy 33:26
sometimes I will say, when did you want to go? Yeah, not. When can you go? And I’m going to make it work more like, when were you thinking you wanted to go? Like, when did you want me to come over for the listing appointment? And then I can be like, well, maybe, maybe not. Or like, here are the times I have available. If your schedule is getting tight, then you have to give them the times

Alissa 33:45
I have also found with my buyer. So I feel like I’m a little bit buyer heavy right now, because our inventory is not the best. So I have some long term buyers because we’re just not finding, we’re not looking every weekend, right? They’re pretty good about knowing, no, that’s not the house, you know, but, but we are looking and chatting during the week right as new listings come up. Um, but what has really helped me since the buyer rep agreement has become mandatory, is having the visual of how many buyers I actually have, yeah, if you’ve watched the Trello video, which, if you Google Alyssa hustle humbly, Trello video, it just comes up on YouTube, but it shows how I have a breakdown of, you know, pre listing. These are people that have reached out, but we’re working on it. Then active listings means we are on the market. My sign is in the yard, yeah, before I had a buyer column that was like, well, these people have reached out and said they would like to buy, right? And that was it, and that was it. Now, since I made the Trello video that you’ll see online, now, I just have an extra column that’s BBA has been signed, yeah, and moving people over to that. Yeah, because that column has like five people in it, those are the series you can’t show the other ones a house right until they sign. It’s almost helped me realize because that buyer column can get pretty messy, and then you feel like you are overwhelmed with buyers just by looking at that column. But then it’s like, well, as a house comes up and they become ready, yeah, now it’s time. We have to do the consultation. We have to sign this form. We need to make sure you’re with your lender, and I can move you over. Yeah. It kind of made me realize that before the BBA was a requirement, I should have had a pre approved column. Yes. Like these are one step further. Yes, they we have actually met with the lender. These are the hot leads. I have spoken to their lender, and we are all on the same page with budget. We needed a warm and a hut I did. And now, if they are in there too long, I do move them to pipeline. But even that is, it was hard to gage. I needed something definite. Yeah, this is helpful. So the BBA has really helped me with that. Now, also with the BBA doing these. Now, we always had the buyer rules, like, I always had a consultation with my clients, which included the buyer rules from email templates, yeah, one of those rules is, please feel free to go to open houses, right, and let them know I’m your agent. Like, if you have a Sunday off, the more houses you can look at as a buyer, out of budget, above your budget, below your budget, just helps your frame of reference. And when I get to that section they like, half the time, they’re like, Oh, we can go to open houses. I’m like, yes, just look tell them I’m your like, the first thing you need to say when you walk in is, hey, our agent, Alyssa Jenkins, told us to come by. Yeah. And then they know, awesome. I don’t have to follow you around, right? I don’t need to waste my energy on trying to convert you to a buyer. And two, if I want to follow up with you, I know who to call Alyssa, right? And they’re like, oh, okay, my buyers, and I think the thing is, since the BBA, we’re seeing so many open houses, yeah, because they’re trying to accommodate buyers, people who didn’t sign, who didn’t sign, like, fascinating. We’re seeing like, I just feel like there are a lot of open houses. There is, and during the week, so many days, I just sold a house to my buyers, who, when I pulled up to the showing on the sign, it was like, open house, Monday through Friday, like 10 till four. Wait the whole day. Yeah, every day, Monday through Friday. Where

Katy 37:40
was this house? Like, in a big neighborhood, in

Alissa 37:43
a neighborhood, but I thought that’s interesting. And this was, like, right when the BBA was really so it’s like, if it’s always bought it, yeah, but we made an appointment right on the weekend, and we showed it and we bought it. So anyway, open houses right now are all over the place with when they’re being done, but

Katy 38:06
does it feel like it’s for the benefit of the seller now? Right?

Alissa 38:10
Yeah, because they’re like, Well, Mr. Seller, we want to make sure we’re getting people in your house. And

Katy 38:14
if it if they’re not willing to sign buyer agreement, maybe they will make

Alissa 38:18
an appointment. Isn’t that interesting? Very interesting. But I think because there’s so many my buyers who are all signed up with me, yeah, are are really taking advantage of seeing as many houses as they can, yeah, which has also helped my capacity, right? Because they do have time to just every Sunday grab a coffee. Eight houses that don’t meet your criteria. I am thankful I did not have to show those to you. Yeah, I mean, it’s fair. My clients just sent me one and it could work. And I was like, you know, it’s later in the week at this point. I’m like, well, when do you want to go? We can go look at it. Because she’s like, I don’t know, it looks like it could check boxes, but I’m not certain that. I don’t really think it’s the one, but I feel like I need to go see it. I’m like, let’s go see it. She’s like, Okay, well, she calls me back. She’s like, hey, my husband can’t go, like, this week with his word, but I see they’re having an open house on Sunday. We may just go to the open house. And I was like, do that, you know? And these are already buyers who sign your agreement. So it’s like, it almost you’re like, go for it, yeah. And then I just fully protected, yeah, I’m fully protected. Go and they do. And it’s so funny because Sunday at around five o’clock, I get all these text messages, hey, Alyssa, so and so here from ABC Realty, your clients came through interesting I’m getting, I’m like, they’re doing their homework, you know? Like, do you think they’re interested? Good for your buyers for actually saying your name? And it’s not just these, like, it’s several, because you’re training them, and then it’s fine, because I messaged them. I’m like, Hey, heard you went to the open house. How’d it go, you know? And they’re like, oh, not the one. But when it’s one that they are serious about, we’re making an appointment with. In a day or two. Yeah? So you need to see it, yeah, I need to see it interesting. But that’s really helped, like the buyer consultation of explaining to buyers, like, look, sellers need notice, especially if it’s occupied. Your schedule has to work. My schedule has to work. There’s open houses like, these are all the things you can do, yeah, has really helped with my capacity, which I think goes back, you know, one of the things you can do to increase your capacity and control your capacity is to have good systems in place, the buyer consultation since BBA has been I always had one, but now it’s just so much more formal. Also, it is more for much more formal. It’s

Katy 40:44
like a listing appointment. It’s not like you could let the kind of, you know, hesitant buyers still call you and be like, let’s run for a showing. Yeah. Now you’re like, you’re either in it or you’re out, yeah. Like you’re either signing or you’re not. Like, you can’t I can’t go. I’m not allowed. You gotta sign, yeah? So

Alissa 41:02
I feel like it’s actually been a very positive thing for my business. Yeah, I feel very protected. Um, less scarcity mindset. Like, what if they go to a for sale by owner? Like, well, now they know not to, right? They’ve always known not to, but now there’s more skin in the game. Yeah, now they know they have to pay you. Yeah, it’s different. Okay, I

Katy 41:21
want to back up a little bit you mentioned some of the stuff with like the holiday parties and things that are going to come here this season. I read an article once about something called kin keeping. Have you ever heard this term? No, k i n like your kinfolk, okay? Kin keeping, and it talked about the mental demand that typically falls to the female of a relationship, or the women of a family, or the matriarch of the family, and it’s the, you know, preparing for the holiday meals, figuring out who’s bringing what. Don’t forget the cheese ball, yeah, getting the gifts, you know, getting the gifts purchased and wrapped, and making sure the kids have the clothes for the photos, and making sure that everyone has the clothes to go to Christmas, and making sure that you plan for the guests who are coming to your house to stay for the holiday, whatever, whatever, whatever. And how these things called kin keeping carry such a heavy mental load that isn’t really a lot of times talked about, and it fell, typically again, to the female, because, you know, 50 years, 100 years ago, they weren’t usually working, right? That was their job, yeah. And so now all these societal norms have just kept pushing it off on the mom, right? Mom, you got to do this. Mom, you got to send the cupcakes to school. Mom, you got to make sure that the kid brings beads next week for the project. Yeah. Well, and the moms are just like, this is just what we like. That term super mom, makes me want to literally get I know and it’s like, something that we don’t talk about enough, or even like, recognize, like, you can’t have that much capacity. You can’t be super mom. You cannot be the room mom and do all the kin keeping and have a full time job and have, like, some sort of side hustle you’re doing, like, and have a hobby and read your book and like, and brush your teeth and have time to, like, wash your hair. Like, how are you going to do all this stuff like it’s just ridiculous and they’re unrealistic expectations that you’re not responsible for feeling that way. Yeah, society put that on you. So you have to also push back, though, that’s my thing. So especially when my kids were really little, or even now after they were in school, a lot of times it’s not necessarily school. They’re pretty good about sending the emails to mom and dad because of divorce, I think so they want to make sure everyone’s getting the messages. It’s more when I get a text message from like, the group chat of mom, like, while we were gone, yeah, Leslie is off at homecoming. I’m in this group chat with moms. Yeah, we were down with the details, but I’m not in charge. I’m gone. Jay is in charge, but he’s not on the group text, so now I’m having to relay message it like. So a lot of times it’s the bless them. I know they don’t mean any harm, but it’s the other moms who go straight to the moms, yeah, and I’m like, I wish there was a better norm of people being like, which parent do I just like when you sell a house? Yeah, who’s the point person? Yeah, who’s the point person on this kid? Who’s the one who has to schedule this stuff, who’s in charge of getting them the cleats for, you know, the athletic event? Like, who? It’s not always me, right? And I want to give everyone the permission to say to someone or their spouse, or whoever your support system is, maybe you have a grandparent that helps, hey, I need more help. I can’t handle all this stuff. Like, I can’t get all this done. Or feel free to be like, Hey, y’all aren’t getting gifts this year. Yeah, nobody got time for this.

Alissa 44:57
I got all this other stuff I got to do. You. Are adults. We are going to focus on the kids this year, right? We draw names, right?

Katy 45:04
I had, I finally, it took years at my on my side, at my parents house, to get them to draw adult names. Wow, because I was fine. I love and y’all, gift giving is my favorite. Yeah, as a Enneagram too, that’s like a big deal. But even then, it can’t be this list of, you know, 840 people who I have to get a gift for, and then it’s expensive on top of that, and you gotta, like, get it done, yeah? So finally, we drew names. It’s like, thank the Lord, glorious, glorious. But I think it’s also okay to just be like, Hey, I’m just giving gifts to children,

Alissa 45:38
yeah? Like, this is what it is, right? Please feel free to reciprocate, right?

Katy 45:42
So I think you have to, if you want to sometimes you know your capacity, you got to also tell people what it is like, hey, sorry, I can’t take another buyer right now, yeah, or

Alissa 45:53
that area is too far from where I live, and I don’t think I could serve you best. Yeah, like, it’s good for all this time there, right? You know? And, yeah, it’s been very freeing, um, referring things out. But you know, what else has made me really happy? The agents who I send it to are so thankful, right? I’m like, right, look at y’all. Y’all are just, you know, it makes me feel good. And then I good karma. It is good karma. And you get to keep your sanity. Yep, I love it. It’s going much better. Such a win win, yeah, such a win win. It is going pretty well. Anything

Katy 46:27
else you have on boundaries, for holidays or in life, or anything else, do you want to make sure that people know

Alissa 46:37
I just think that don’t be afraid to say, I have an appointment that day. Yeah, you know we, we are the ones that are putting the self imposed urgency on us. Yeah. Now, if you know that, you know the COVID years are over, there’s not 12 offers on a house anymore, yeah. And I will say, use that Gage. Like, if a house has been on the market 90 days, and your buyer wants to go see it. It could probably wait

Katy 47:02
till Tuesday, or it might still be here. Yeah, yeah. But

Alissa 47:06
it’s like, yeah, you know, if it’s a brand new listing, and it looks awesome. And, you know, I just listed that house in Jamestown. And my phone, I’ve listed several houses, I do not get phone calls, right? I list this one. People are calling. It’s so cute. People are calling, hey, how just do I need to get there now? I need to go look at this list. How many showings Do you have? Like, I can get there today. I would like to go tomorrow. But should I get there today? You know, they’re asking, and I’m like, You need to get there today. Also good for them, for knowing and understanding the market and the

Katy 47:40
product. So

Alissa 47:41
it made me like, learning from them. Yeah, you know, I’m like, that’s really smart. Like, ask and then tell your buyer, hey, I spoke to the agent. We’re good to go tomorrow. Yeah, don’t stress. We got this. But save your urgency for when it’s urgent. Sometimes it is, what? What a quote. Save your urgency for when it’s urgent. Yeah, sometimes it is, sometimes it’s not, but if everything is urgent, that’s when you just totally wear yourself out. Well, if everything’s urgent, then nothing is urgent. Yes, like, right? It can’t all be designated urgent. And don’t let all the shiny things that are on your calendar actually take away from the client that you worked so hard to get, I know, like that’s what you worked for, right? Give them priority, right? Keep It Simple when we just focus on our buyers and our sellers and our work within our work it, it keeps our work so much more simple. Yes, and all these other fluffy things that we feel like we need to be doing to be working, just can fade a little bit. Yeah. So this was a good pep talk. Oh, great. Thank you, Katie.

Katy 48:52
Oh my gosh, you’re so welcome. Thank you. Are you gonna read us a toast? Yeah, back in the day, when we used to read toast, yeah, we

Alissa 49:00
got one sent to us, actually, from Brittany Goins, from Oklahoma, who’s in community. She is in community. I think she was our member of the month. She was one year. I meant one month, yeah, one year, one year. She was so good, yeah. She had it every every single month. Is very involved in our community. And so I’m gonna read her message. I’d like to make a toast to Whitney a June. I had the pleasure of meeting Whitney at my brokerage around a year ago. She is the best friend and colleague I could have ever imagined having. She’s still taking time to help me answer questions and run comps while hustling in her business and killing it. I’m so proud of you. Wit, I wish you all the love and success in the world. PS, she turned she tuned me on to hustle humbly. Oh, wow, sweet. Cheers, I know. Cheers Whitney. Cheers Brittany. Y’all just take a deep breath, ask for help. Delete things off your calendar that don’t need to be there. You know, don’t buy for adults, right? Anything? Know your limits, know your limit. Know your limit. You know what I’m doing in December. What

Katy 50:03
are you doing? I’m

Alissa 50:04
leaving for eight days on a cruise before

Katy 50:06
the holiday. Yep. Oh, that’s gonna be great. It’ll be like, bye. Bye, guys. I don’t want to do any of this. I’m not doing

Alissa 50:13
it. I’m leaving. I’m leaving, leaving the country. Well, that’ll work.

Katy 50:17
Okay? Bye, everyone. Bye,

Alissa 50:19
thank you so much for tuning in to the hustle humbly podcast. If

Katy 50:22
you enjoyed this episode, please go to rate this podcast.com/hustle, humbly, and leave us a review or drop a comment if you’re listening on Spotify,

Alissa 50:30
if you have an episode topic or someone you’d like to toast on the show, please email us at team at hustle humbly podcast.com, find

Katy 50:37
us on social media at hustle humbly podcast, don’t forget to find all of the free resources at hustle humbly. Podcast.com/resources,

Alissa 50:46
see you next week. This is the good life you.