The stories in our own heads can truly get the best of us. In this episode of “podcast therapy” we share our own personal struggles with the stories in our heads. Why did that buyer ghost us after seeing all those houses when we seemed to get along so well? What about the seller that said you were getting the listing only for you to discover the house hitting the market without YOU? We’ve all been there and the mental load that comes along with not knowing can be heavy. We are sharing with you our own tips and tricks for dealing with the unknown as well as being a listening ear when there really is nothing you can do. You know we love a mindset episode and this one was much needed and truly cathartic. Want to join us for more “podcast therapy”? Join the Community at hustlehumblypodcast.com/membership for our April live therapy talk session!

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The following is a rough transcript provided by Otter.ai.

Alissa 0:01
Why does it always have to be yours? Just put us out of our misery. Oh,

Katy 0:05
you’re gonna sit with this stuff for a long time. I hate your current agent. Yeah,

Alissa 0:10
click here. You don’t have to work with them. They liked me so much.

Alissa 0:17
They’re not going to call me back

Katy 0:20
here and I said And don’t call me back and talk to me like this again. Wow, that’s how bad it was. Click button to sign here with the devil.

Alissa 0:32
Okay, podcast therapy. Okay, ready? Hi, y’all. Welcome to hustle humbly. It’s Alyssa and Katie. And we are two top producing realtors in the Baton Rouge market.

Katy 0:42
We work for two different companies where we should be competitors. But we have chosen community over competition.

Alissa 0:47
The goal of our podcasts is to encourage you to find your own way in business to stop comparing yourself and start embracing your strengths. Hi, Alyssa. Hey, Katie.

Katy 0:56
It’s episode 246. The stories in your

Alissa 1:01
head, the stories in your head? What do we tell ourselves? Do you tell yourself

Katy 1:05
What else do you tell yourself? It makes me think of when you say Oh, lunch with me. I can’t I can’t cancel

Alissa 1:13
that. Lunch with me. I can’t cancel a lot. Again. The stories

Katy 1:17
in your head. Okay. When we came up with this topic, I don’t remember the actual impetus of the whole thing. But I immediately remembered and I thought it was Mel Robbins, but it was not. Okay. So all of you Brene Brown fans don’t yell at me because I did find out it was Brene Brown. Okay, who said the most powerful stories may be the ones we tell ourselves. But beware. They’re usually fiction. Oh, okay. So I brought like, before you launch into your actual real estate stories you told yourself, do you want to hear more about Brene browns? The stories you tell yourself? Yeah,

Alissa 1:57
and I also think before that, please. Where we’re going with this is that real estate gives you a lot of opportunity to make up things in your head

Katy 2:06
fill in the blank. Real estate is a lot like Mad Libs. Like what

Alissa 2:10
is happening or did that person go when they ghosted me is my seller? Angry? Do they hate me? You know, so

Katy 2:19
many opportunities to make assumptions? Yes, yes. And you depending on your confidence level are not going to ask for the real story. Right? You’re just gonna be like, Nope, I know what happened. It’s happened before

Alissa 2:33
right? Always happens a lot like life.

Katy 2:37
Real Estate a lot like life. Alright, so I’ll quickly give you the backstory on the Brene Brown, world renowned researcher and speaker Brene Brown best known for her work on vulnerability and shame introduces the concept of the story. I’m telling myself in her book Rising Strong, okay, ever read any burning? Man, you know, but it’s download Brene Brown is hugely famous. She had like a Uber viral TED Talk. This book Rising Strong, I think was her first but she has several books now an amazing podcast. I’ve listened to once or twice. But she’s, she’s legit. Okay. Okay. But she introduced the story. I’m telling myself in Rising Strong as a powerful tool for navigating difficult conversations and conflicts in relationships. Yes. Okay. And then this particular article I’m reading from is actually Shreeka Rogers from the marriage point blog like, this is there she’s looking at it in relation to marriages, but I feel like client relationships are a little bit like marriage. Yes. So what exactly is the story I’m telling myself, okay, at its core, the story I’m telling myself is a way of acknowledging and examining the narratives we construct in our minds about ourselves, our partners and our relationships. These stories are often influenced by our past experiences, fears and assumptions and can have a powerful impact on our emotions, behaviors and relationships. Right? The examples of stories listed earlier, like she, I guess, is going through a bunch of them along with hundreds of other stories you could probably share with me and how and how this may be comical as we look back at them and share them aloud, like what you were telling yourself and what the truth was. We’re about to do your real estate versions, right? Yeah. Okay, so using the concept of the story, I’m telling myself, you can pause and reflect on what’s really going on instead of assuming the worse, you can ask your partner or the person that’s in this relationship with you what’s going on and share the story you’re telling yourself. You actually would say, You know what, the story I’m telling myself is you’re mad because blah, blah, blah, or you’re upset that I did blah, blah, blah, or you’re you don’t want to work with me anymore or whatever, okay? By doing this, you can start to understand each other’s perspectives and work towards a more positive and constructive conversation. When, and here’s how the story I’m telling myself is going to help you it’s going to improve communication, right? manage conflict. So if it’s something going on build trust and increase emotional intimacy, and that’s basically the whole story. Okay, but I think that was kind of a good overview from the Shreeka. Yeah, thank you Google machine. About the story. I’m

Alissa 5:21
telling myself, that was very helpful. When I was a newer agent. I feel like I told myself a lot more stories, because my confidence wasn’t there yet. You bright? So I just assumed everything was my fault. They, they I showed them houses and then they ghosted me they it was me, right, and you

Katy 5:43
don’t have enough track record to know the difference, right? So you’re just like, wow, must have been me. They don’t like me.

Alissa 5:50
And I find myself like every now and then a story will sneak up on me. And I realized, like, Oh, I am telling myself this. And I don’t even know like I get in a funk or I have a difficult client situation, right? You know, whatever the case may be, that causes me to slowly but surely start creating this whole narrative. Yeah. I also feel like this happens a lot. When we tell our clients about the other party. Like when you see when you’re like, well, the seller said they won’t make that repair. They start telling themselves, the sellers are mean, the sellers are a jerk. They’re not nice. And then you make it to the closing table eventually. And everyone’s like, Oh, they were so friendly. They were so friendly kind. But buyers and sellers also make up so many narratives and stories in their head about who’s buying or selling their house. And we have to manage that as well. Yeah.

Katy 6:47
All the assumptions of all the parties. Yeah, everyone’s making assumptions, not just you. The other agent is making assumptions. Well, your sellers and being very negotiable. Well, hey, guess what the seller is in bankruptcy, and they literally have no more money to get like, you don’t know the story.

Alissa 7:01
Even when I do have a very difficult seller. I try not to ever let the other side No, no, that no, no, just you’re you’re there to see all thing. Look, you know, I understand these repairs, were very important to your buyer. My seller is in a situation where this is all he can really do. Yeah. So you know, we’re not trying to be ugly. This is just the response. Right? We would love to keep it together. Yeah. You know, but never be like, Look, I’m dealing with like, such a terrible person over here. And I can’t tell you how many times I have heard that up.

Katy 7:40
Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, I hear that all the time. Oh, the sellers. Terrible. Oh, this buyer doesn’t listen, oh, they’re, you know, they’re never. I’ve also had agents say the sellers. Terrible. They’ll never do that law. And I’ll be like, Well, can you have to ask them because I’m putting in here and then the seller does it and then the agent is still like miffed about it. Like, I can’t believe they did that. They said they didn’t want to do repairs, and now they’re doing all these repairs. But were you ever the boss and say this is how it goes? Or just be like they’re allowed to change their mind? Yeah, you can’t put the seller in a box. Or the buyer. Use Bella do like when you say you said you wanted to live in a three bedroom home? This is a two bedroom home.

Alissa 8:20
Are you sure we need to go look at this. I’m just going what you said. You said. Okay.

Katy 8:25
I think there are some general stories that Realtors tell themselves before you tell me a good like real story. Sellers don’t want to pay my full service commission. Automatically. Everyone rolls into that listing appointment, like sellers don’t want to pay this. I’m going to have to convince them I’m going to beg them, right? They don’t think I’m worth it. And I don’t think I’m worth it either. I don’t think I’m worth it either. My market is oversaturated my favorite. There’s just too many agents in this market. My market is oversaturated and then my sphere thinks I’m bothering them when I reach out. This is the story I’m telling myself. Yeah, nobody wants to hear from me. I can’t go to a birthday party and mentioned what I do for work or just ask someone else what they do and then answer your when they asked you

Alissa 9:15
well then you’re only going to your kids friend’s birthday parties to be salesy, like like those are the narratives

Katy 9:22
and that was my last one asking for businesses salesy.

Alissa 9:26
I have another one okay. I’m not successful because of my brokerage. Oh, that’s a good one. Like you know, the stories

Katy 9:33
you’re telling yourself like, oh, I have to change brokers in order to be successful if I do this, if I buy this product will be better if I join this team. If I buy this online lead if I do these things, like what are the stories you’re telling yourself? Are they really based in fact, okay,

Alissa 9:52
I have a quote for you. Well, please, we don’t see things as they are. We see things as we are. Oh yeah. Love That was so good. And it really related to me with when I was newer, because I saw just the natural shift of confidence. Yeah. And with that confidence and getting some transactions under my belt. I knew like I was very passionate about giving this advice because I knew it was good advice. I have seen it work, right. And you only

Katy 10:23
have to sell two houses or one house to have sold to have been involved in more transactions than a first time buyer. Like literally you have to only have done one. Yes. And then you’re like I’ve done this, or two, then you’re like an expert. Right? So it is. So interesting, though, how we just get caught up in our head. Do you want to hear something about ADHD? it with our friends with ADHD, there is something called I think it’s rejection sensitivity. It’s got some initials, but basically, they can get in that loop in their head where they’re super sensitive to rejections. Even when they’re not rejections, they make them out to be like an actual rejections, but I think everyone falls victim to this at some point. Like you just take things so hard, and you almost have to like, do it over and over again, in order to like get used to the rejection. We have a whole episode on rejection. Yeah. And I think you get used to it after a while. The other thing about our sweet ADHD friends are they’re always thinking, so the story you’re telling yourself isn’t just one story. It’s like 6000 stories all the time running in your brain. Like it’s hard to turn that off.

Alissa 11:30
Yeah, it’s very hard to turn that off. And there’s actually a term for it to running. Right? What rumination, rumination, rumination is continuously thinking the same thought, yeah, not necessarily, like tons at one time. But yeah, if you’re thinking something over and over and over again, it’s called rumination. Hmm. And it is the number one risk factor for depression and anxiety, right?

Katy 11:54
Because you’re creating a pattern. And then you’re just in that loop and that pattern, and then just you default back to that.

Alissa 12:00
That’s your go to Yeah. And then because you are telling yourself the wrong narrative. Yeah. You’re even more hesitant to pick up the phone to reach out again, right? Try again, right? Because you are telling yourself, this person doesn’t like me. Yeah, this person is upset with me. Yeah. So there are things that I think it’s time for story. Okay, please do you want to go first? One of my very first clients, I still remember them. I had communicated with them forever. I met they came through one of my open houses, okay, back in like 2012. So here I am, like we use. Yep, senior old boys, like I’m 16 and probably wearing my blazers and my suit for this open house that they write to. But they were just the nicest couple. He was actually the principal at a local school. Okay. And I think maybe that’s why he’s like, look at this child sweet. He’s trying to make it in the world. Anywho they just chatted with me forever. And we’re fascinated by Oh, you’re doing this while you like you just finished school and you went straight to this anyway. So I gave them my card. And they signed in my sheet and I wrote them a thank you for coming to my Open House letter, and we start looking at houses, they reached out to me back and said, Look, we would love for you to help us find a house. I see. We’re like Ray, yeah, the one of my first clients ever, okay. I was like it’s working. You know, they said, if you do open houses and follow up with people and you know, be yourself, then it’ll work. And so it’s working. So I showed them a few houses, and it was going well, and then one day, they disappear. And I was just beside myself. Like, I

Katy 13:49
can’t believe this.

Alissa 13:50
I couldn’t believe it. I was so disappointed. And just knew I had done something wrong.

Katy 13:58
How many times did you reach out when they disappeared? Like probably

Alissa 14:01
a lot, I would say I mean, this was you know, over 10 years ago. Yeah. regularly. Yeah. And then it just got to where, you know, once a month, I would just say, Hey, did you but and you know, could they have responded? Sure. But they didn’t and so right. Because they didn’t respond. I was just you had to fill in the blanks. I was filling in the blanks, and I’m not gonna fill in the blanks in a positive way. Oh, because they were gone. Yeah. Like you didn’t they liked me so much. Right? They’re not going to call me back. So fast forward. Okay. Like two years. Oh, my. Yeah, this was very tumultuous. Okay. Yeah. And I will say in this two years, I feel like it sort of carried over into my other buyer relationship. I

Katy 14:53
thought they were all going to you had abandonment issues. I did. Because

Alissa 14:56
I thought these people I thought were legit, right? And if they came, they fooled you into thinking they liked you. And if they can go smeet anyone can go see anybody. Okay, so fast forward two years, okay? And she calls me, okay. And I’m like, hello. She’s like, Alyssa, It’s Suzy Right? Um, I know, we haven’t, you know, really gotten to talk and I wanted to apologize for that. But this house just came up and we’d really like to see it. And I’m thinking, why this lady here? She abandoned me. Yeah. And just expects me to like, I would like to point out I am making this all about me. Correct. This is about me hurt your feelings. My feelings. This is about me. Yeah, you expect me to come after two years of reaching out to you. And I would like to keep in mind the house she was reaching out about is one that I still she got it from the auto drip that I just kept going. Yeah, for their search, like I had set up a search for. I just kept it going. And then in between, I would reach out every now and then. Okay. No. So she was like, I saw that one. You know, I think it’s worth looking at. I’m like, Okay, so I’m like, I guess I should just go and like try to talk to them in person and see so I get to the house early. I like turn on the lights and they walk up and she has no hair. And she is so skinny. And I saw her and my face dropped and she said I know I’ve just not been in a good place. Right I found out very quickly like after we last chatted that I had a very aggressive cancer I wasn’t sure if I was going to make it for a while there. Good news things are looking better and I’m sorry like she owed me nothing no wood a little bit of a just a

Katy 17:09
quick today having some personal issues won’t be looking right now but that

Alissa 17:12
have been appreciated. Wouldn’t that have been hard? She had no fish to fry, but she had way bigger fish to fry than me. Yeah, okay. It was just like girl I don’t. And it just like actually shattered my brain. You’re like, oh my god, years of wandering and ruminating about this. You’re like, oh, man, and I was like it had nothing to do with me and how dumb of me and self centered of me Yeah, to just instantly think everything’s about me. Everything’s about you. And she was going through something. life altering rocked her world her first thought was I need to call that 20 year old realtor and tell her about my issue. No, she never thought that they bought that house that I showed them that day. We got the sale done and I still keep in touch with them now. Yeah. And they would send me pictures of the renovation they were doing and but it’s like I could have ruined that relate I could have self destructed that relationship from the story in my head. Yes. being mad. How are you? I’m not coming to show you a house after you go sit me you should

Katy 18:31
have been putting out good vibes for her. I know she needed them. I could have been like pray for this all right. Had she responded You could have thrown her prayer in

Alissa 18:41
bed I was over here you know self destructing making it about me, right but it really made me go. You never know. You never know.

Katy 18:52
I have one like that. Yeah. Are you done with that one? Okay. I have a client who was a referral. It was the longest referral string I have it was my I got a referral. And then they referred me to all their sisters and the mom and then the sisters friends the sisters would then refer me it was like if I had to do a family tree of who gave me the most business it was this family. Right. Okay. They sent me one of their best friends that worked with them. A couple of the sisters work together they send the best friend there like she also they were all like young first time buyers when I worked with them. She’s also young, ready to buy our first house looking in the area close to where we bought. Will you show it to her? Yes. I mean, we even went to a few showings the friend came like the girl was that like she was a you know, single young girl. I was just so excited to work with her. She was so excited. You know, she was sorting out some financial stuff. And then there was a reason why there was like a little break I think while she was doing that and then I just didn’t really hear from her but we had become friends on social media and I would follow her and come and just to kind of like keep in touch right. I’m excited to work with you. I’m gonna follow you. I’m gonna keep in touch with you this way. And then of course, here we are one day. She posts this picture of this precious house she bought. And I was just ill I was ill. I was like, oh my god, first of all, I’m sad that I lost her. But the house she bought, I was like, this is a good house. Sell. Why would she buy this was someone else the curb appeal the cuteness of this house, everything. I was just like, I even had seen it on the MLS and thought this house is so precious. And then to have one of my home to America quotes

Alissa 20:33
client, one of your

Katy 20:33
clients. So I thought, buy this house. Okay, I was just like, wow, like, why would she not work with me? I just don’t get it. And you know, since she posted on social media, and we had been communicating for let’s just say, a couple of years this way. I just responded and said, Oh, my gosh, this house is so cute. I saw it in the MLS. I’m so happy for you, you know, how

Alissa 20:57
did you DM her? Or was like, I

Katy 20:59
vote? Oh, no, like, I DM her, I think and I was just like, I hope that you know, you’re really happy there or something like that. And she was like, thanks so much. You know, she had gotten engaged or started dating someone in the interim. And she’s like, we’re so excited, whatever. And I just left it at that. I didn’t ask her why I just was like, You know what, I’m gonna be the bigger person and then I’m just in my head. I’m like, That’s Dottie. She She didn’t want to work with me. Like, I don’t know why I swear to you years past.

Alissa 21:29
And I Why does it always have to be yours? Just put us out of our misery. Oh, you’re gonna

Katy 21:34
sit with this stuff for a long time. Like when something bad happens? You may not know the end of the story for a really long time. Oh, so a couple of years or more pass. And the the one who had originally referred me to her, calls me over to the house. She’s like, I think we might be ready to sell because it’s been plenty a year since they bought and like, okay, great. I come over to sit with her. We have lunch at their house, look at the house talk, you know, because we were friendly. And then I don’t know, it came up like the fridge. The freezer came up. And she said that they had actually had, you know, like a falling out and their relationship. And that was strained. And basically, I think I was too close to that side of the relationship. And she was kind of like, I don’t, it wasn’t, you know, it was me, it was her they had a thing. And so now, fast forward even further. Let’s give it another year or two. The the original girl with a cute house that I’m so sad about calls me and it’s like, Hey, we’re moving. And we want to sell this cute. Oh, my gosh, the history of the world. And I was like, you want me? I’m like so excited. Like, the house.

Alissa 22:49
You’re like, answers closure. I’m

Katy 22:52
so happy coming. I would love to do that. I’ll be right over whatever you need. And I think when I was there, I’m like, well, so tell me about who sold you the house because why aren’t you working with them? And she’s like, Oh, that was like a friend of my husband, my new husband at the time. And he was a terrible agent and we that hated the process and it was just awful. And we would never ever work with him again. Wow. And I was just like, Okay,

Alissa 23:20
well I can’t tell you how excited I am to work with you but to sell this house because I love this. I love it. I love that you asked you know we’ve said before on other episodes if you’re wondering if you’re thinking if you’re in your head just add Yeah, you know we’re sharing some success stories right now but I’m in the middle of one right now. I don’t know if it’s gonna be a success. Well, it’s gonna be fine. But like I’m in my head about it. Tell us about okay, podcast therapy.

Katy 23:54
Okay ready

Alissa 23:56
a friend’s parent um called me to sell their house okay, they let me know they’re gonna go build over here in this neighborhood right that I’m familiar with but I wasn’t asked to they already told me they had like their their sort of talked to him they haven’t signed anything they’ve talked to a builder this and that. Okay, so in this situation, they this builder is always paying a buyer’s agent okay, like even if you don’t have a buyer’s agent that it doesn’t sell they chain money right doesn’t save so they’re they’re very buyer agent friendly. Okay. Like love it. Yeah. Like you say you would I think the builders like please go get an agent. Right? I

Katy 24:37
don’t want to I don’t want to be your run interference on you.

Alissa 24:40
Right got Oh, so I go to the house for the listing appointment. And the seller slash buyer is pretty direct and blunt, but in a way that I appreciate because I’m sort of that way as well and have gotten more so over the years because I have learned that Staying in the cycle of wondering the second year, ask the cycles ended. Yeah is over, right. So I appreciate his communication style. So he’s like, Hey, I just want to give you a heads up. We were gonna go meet to sign this contract on this new build. And you know, I was fine just doing it myself, I don’t really need an agent to help me build this house. Okay, I know what I’m doing. I built this house that you’re about to sell, okay. But they told me that it doesn’t save me any money to not to not have an agent. So I’m like, Okay, well, I’m very familiar with the neighborhood. I know, the builders and they’re like, I’d be happy to represent you. It’s a great area. So he’s like, Okay, well, you know, I’ll let you know. So we just put that to the side and worked on the list for his house that we were going to sell. So the next day, the builder calls me, someone I knew was like, hey, so and so let me know that he may be adding you to the contract next week. And I just wanted to touch base with you. He did ask me, if he had you involved? Would it changed the price? And I told him know that. And when he told me you were his agent, I was like, yes, like, definitely call her, you know, okay. So I said, well, thank you for saying that. And, you know, that’s exactly the conversation I had with him as well. And the builder was like, Oh, good. And I said, Yeah, that’s actually what I appreciate about this guy. So he basically told me, right, if you’re gonna cost me money, like, I’m not gonna use you, and I was just like, I appreciate the honesty, it actually doesn’t cost you any money. So it was just a transparent, blunt conversation that I appreciated. Well, so I’m on the contract. I went to the for the architect meeting, I went to the meetings, okay, well, now, when the builder, like, sends us all on the same chain, his agent me, my buyers, my buyer keeps taking me off the chain.

Katy 27:04
So this is fascinating. And I’m thinking, okay, like he responds and removes you

Alissa 27:11
yet leaves everybody else. Okay. So, one of the chains, after the architect meeting after everything, the builder sent a message to all of us and said, Hey, we need to schedule this meeting. To look over this. Let me know how your schedule looks. The next day, the builder said, Hey, guys, great meeting yesterday. Here’s the notes that we have. And I’m just like, Have I missed a Vidya? But then I see below that he removed you. Yes. And the builder keeps adding me back. And he tears. Me. So it’s like very hard. Like I’m a professional. Get out of my header at this point. Right? This one is throwing. This was tricky, because it’s very intentional.

Katy 28:02
We have you asked. So it

Alissa 28:05
got to the point where I was just like, very in my head. So I’m talking to myself, Alyssa, you know that you’re in your head about this. You’re taking it personal, rightfully so. But I don’t think this is all about you. Like maybe you just need to ask him right, what’s going on? So I sat down with Connie helped me I need to because I wanted to send him an email, and then follow up, you know, so Connie helped me, you know, write an email that was just because I was like, This is what I want to say. But I needed it to sound professional. So you know, I should have pulled it up. But I didn’t. So I basically just said, Hey, I know that you know, you’ve built your houses before you let me know from the beginning that you didn’t necessarily need me involved. When I am involved in a transaction. I do pride myself on working for all of my transactions. I also want to let you know I am available for all of these meetings. Yeah, so if you ever want me at a meeting, I am available, right? In the meantime, the builder is copying me on all the selections and choices and changes. And I am keeping track of everything in my file just to have an extra set of eyes. I know you’re very diligent, right? But I’m also tracking everything. And I don’t want to overstep or intrude, but I am here right if you need me, okay, I sent that about six weeks ago. Nothing

Katy 29:41
Nothing.

Alissa 29:46
What never even responded. So then I got really in my head and I called the builder. I said, Look, I don’t know what exactly or why you know you You know, from the beginning that he didn’t care if I was involved, right that he just kind of put me on there. But I’m sort of personally struggling with my value, because I don’t necessarily care to just show up at closing and pick up a check. And I am in my head a little bit. And I wanted to call you personally and let you know that the reason I haven’t been at any of these meetings, because is because I don’t know about them. And I appreciate that you have kept me in the loop. And I have told him that I’m available, right? I don’t think he wants me at these meetings. I’m not quite I know that he is very particular. And he has this under control. Okay. But I am not used to being on a contract where I’m not involved. Okay, what does the builder so they’re kind of just laughed and said, I know you I know that this would never be your your MO. He said, to be honest, the meetings have all been very last minute. Um, you know, he is very, he knows what he wants, and he is going to stick to his stuff. So, you know, I don’t think he was like, I don’t think you’re doing anything wrong. And I said, Okay, well, I want I didn’t want to look bad to you the builder as because I said, at this point, I may not see you till closing. And I’m not really okay with that. But I’m not sure what to do about it either. So the builder is still we’re still building and I I’m not happy with the listing. So with the listing, I had somebody who I thought would be the perfect buyer for it. Okay. And I reached out to him and I said, Look, I have someone who I would like to show because we weren’t gonna list it right away, because he’s building right waiting for the house to be done. We were going to wait till we were a little closer. Okay. I said, Would you be willing to let me show it? He said, Well, if you have the buyer, I don’t want it’s not that he necessarily. He didn’t want dual agency. So he’s like, you just represent them. I will represent myself. Okay. So I’m like, fuck, actually, in this situation. I’m like, great. Rather that I’d think dual agency would be tricky. For sure. Here. Okay. So I wrote the contract. On the listing agent side i for the title company stuff, I just put like for sale by owner instead of listing agents, a title company will know he is representing himself. Okay. So it’s a tricky situation where I am representing the buyer on his listing. Got him exactly what he wanted. He got to pick the close date, which was five months away. Yeah, the buyers were willing to let them do that. Okay. Everything is going extremely smooth. My buyers asked for nothing during the inspection. Okay. The perfect situation. Okay. Yeah. But when it comes in, his wife is talking to me. Oh, well, wait, we’re not. Not a lot. She will respond. Okay. To an email.

Katy 33:11
Did she respond to the emails now? Weeks? Again? I

Alissa 33:14
sent it to her too. She did not. But I will say when I pick up the phone and caller, I feel so much better.

Katy 33:22
Okay, because she answers and

Alissa 33:24
it’s so pleasant. Okay. But I haven’t done that in a minute. I was doing it. And then I just got in my head. I’m actually ruminating the last few weeks on on this. Do

Katy 33:39
you think he’s just removing you because you got him everything you wanted on his listing? He didn’t he didn’t pay you for that. And now he’s just like, maybe I want you to not have to work.

Alissa 33:49
I think he’s just like, stay out of my way. I don’t need you like no offense. But and this is my story. I’m telling myself, here’s my story. I’m telling myself tell right now tell all of us. The story I’m telling myself is that he is like, I don’t want to sit because I’m also very controlling in my transactions. I think he has that in him too, which makes him the good businessman that he is okay. He does not in fact, care to have me at these meetings because he knows what he wants, what he wants it for how it’s going to be. He’s telling the builder, this is what I want. Okay. My input is not needed. Okay. Why have another person there? Just to be there. Well, okay. Okay. That is the story. I’m telling myself. Okay. I don’t think he dislikes me per se. Could the communication be better? Yes. Do I call a Okay,

Katy 34:54
is this a past client? How do we know to start with he’s my

Alissa 34:57
friend’s dad. Over here. Right? Right. Okay. So that’s kind of in my head too is I don’t want my friend to think I’m not doing a good job. I don’t know. Have you told them? I don’t want to talk about

Katy 35:08
and just be like, Hey, is has your have your parents mentioned the process just wanted to make sure they’re happy with my service

Alissa 35:15
that I’m not providing. They don’t want you to provide it. I know, okay, though, just this past week, the builder sent like, this whole outdoor like addition, okay, they’re doing this meeting they had that I was not a part of okay. And I responded to all okay, and said, I love this. This looks amazing. I think this is going to be perfect for this neighborhood. Specifically, you’re going to really enjoy this space. So I’ve just, I’m chiming in. Great. But I do feel like when you get in these situations like I’m in right now, you get to the point where you have to pick up the phone. Probably. There’s only so much that can be conveyed via email. Yeah. And text message, Rajesh, and he is a bit intimidating to call because he’s not necessarily like a phone. I don’t think he’s a communicator, clearly. But he he has a very stressful job. So it’s like, you don’t really want to call him during business hours.

Katy 36:21
Can you just call the wife and be like, hey, just checking in to make sure things are going okay, do

Alissa 36:26
that. I need to do that. But what what Katie, say, like,

Katy 36:31
hey, just calling to check in and make sure everything’s going okay,

Alissa 36:34
I saw that. Just let her talk outdoor playing looks really great. You must be excited about that. Yes. House packing going on your other house on your house that I’m selling, right?

Katy 36:44
Maybe they just feel like your job is done? Do you want to be like I know, but I feel. Who cares?

Alissa 36:49
I know.

Katy 36:50
Here’s the other thing. They don’t care how you feel, obviously. And you’re gonna get the checks either way, and just don’t work with them again?

Alissa 36:59
Well, this will be their forever home. And they haven’t been better. You’re not going to work with them again. Right? Who cares? I want the relationships to say good. So what I’m going to do is I’m just going to show up when I can with a smile.

Katy 37:12
How many past clients do you have?

Alissa 37:15
I don’t know, like hundreds? Yeah,

Katy 37:17
1000. Let’s call it over 500. This is what you just happen to be in it right now. These people just don’t care if you do anything. And

Alissa 37:26
it’s like a custom house. So this is going on for like driving on and on

Katy 37:30
and right is dragging on. I do think you should call the wife and just be like, Hey, I know building can be stressful. Just wanted to check in. Okay, you know, how’s it going?

Alissa 37:40
I did that in the beginning a few times, but towards the end. So for example, my they were trying to figure out because there actually may be a one month or so gap from their house being finished. But we cannot give them any more time. So they may have to, like live with family or figure something out. That’s very stressful. It is very stressful. One of my newer construction rental properties, the one by my house came available, so I thought this would be a great time to offer some value. Since I’m feeling invaluable. Right. That’s also a question I asked myself in these situations is what is there something I could do?

Katy 38:23
I would like to point back to the fact that you sold his house without getting paid by him, which means that the buyer who was already your buyer, you would have been paid for either way. So he basically got off without paying for you. Yes. So the fact that you’re not really working hard on his purchase doesn’t bother me as much because he didn’t pay you to do the sale. Right? And you brought him the buyer and got him everything he wanted, and he didn’t have to pay you. I know. This guy doesn’t bother me at all. I would be like, You’re weird. And if you want to take me off the emails, fine. I’m going to show up and get my check and smile and be polite. I might even bring you a housewarming gift.

Alissa 39:02
I know that I’m awkward in this.

Katy 39:05
I think you can keep reaching out to the wife though. Okay. Hey, what happens if you text her? Does she respond? I would call and text just be like, hey, checking in again. I know. It’s been a few weeks. I love the outdoor plan. Is everything going? Okay, what’s the time I know that? So and So husband. Okay, so

Alissa 39:22
So I messaged them, I emailed them the link to my rental property. Okay. The pictures are so good because it was like it’s empty. It’s you know, I said, Hey, I know y’all are in transition. And we’re working on figuring out timing. I just had this rental close to your home become available. Before I put it on the market. I wanted to check and see if you had any need for it if you wanted to rent it for like a month or two so that you could start moving out if you needed to stay there while you’re in transition. Right? Just let me know before I decide to put it back on the market. Nothing Nope. So I message the why If something unrelated, okay, via texts, okay? And she did respond and said, Hey, great Rennell thank you so much for thinking about us. But I’m like, we don’t need it or something. So I was like, okay, just wanted to make sure. And have

Katy 40:14
you asked your friend whose dad it is anything? Because just be like, Hey, how are your parents handling the build process? Yeah, I know that sometimes it can be difficult.

Alissa 40:25
I earlier on I did. And they were like, oh, yeah, they’re there every day. Like they’re at the construction site every day. Have you been to the construction? I even sent them a bit like one time I went by just to take a video. And to be like, Hey, I would buy your house. It looks good. And then I thought, well, that was dumb. He goes every day. But did they respond? So it’s just one of those things where here’s the deal. We cannot control their response. Okay. Would it have been easier? Would it have been easy for my sweet, sweet client with cancer to just shoot me a text point in that two years? And tell me she might be dying? Each like, yeah, that would have been so helpful for me, but did not about you. It’s not about me. He is under a lot of financial stress right now. I am sure he’s been in his house for 30 something years. Yeah, this is a big deal to them that they are moving. That is very stressful. And here I am trying to make it about me. What a little bit of you’re not letting me work hard. And you know what, a little bit of communication be appreciated. Yes.

Katy 41:37
But at this point, in

Alissa 41:38
this case, I’m

Katy 41:39
like, you’re already in it. Like your name is on it. You’re getting paid. I know the builder knows you’re not trying to be

Alissa 41:46
I know an ever since I had the converse honestly, I realized I cared more about what the builder in the in the builders agent thought.

Katy 41:53
Did you talk to the agent?

Alissa 41:54
I did? Like we’re good. So they know. They know.

Katy 41:58
I’m gonna go with a who cares on this? Yeah, who cares, right? Like, I

Alissa 42:03
know you care. But I mean, just, but I’m getting to where I’m trying to get out of the cycle as a gift, right? I’m trying to get out of the cycle of caring in a negative way. I’m trying to change the story. I’m telling myself because even just saying he doesn’t dislike me, he just knows what he’s doing and doesn’t want my help. So I would also probably

Katy 42:23
say he doesn’t value agents in general very much. That’s true. I think I can totally handle this on my own. Yeah, but if they’re gonna force me to pay someone I might as well let you be pay and I’m gonna triple check that you being involved does not cost me anything. So you know what I mean? Like he’s like, Well, if I have to, I mean, I might as well give it to someone that’s friends with my daughter. And to

Alissa 42:47
be honest, the builder the builders that Alyssa so many agents never come to these meetings. Right and I never get a phone call so just the fact that this is bothering you,

Katy 42:58
right? Doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter. Right? Okay, we’ve so

Alissa 43:02
that you know, but just talking it out. Yeah. With you. I was saving it for podcast therapy. Perfect.

Katy 43:09
Do you feel better I will

Alissa 43:11
call her when I was clean here and maybe I should do it on air. I want to go How funny would that be? I’m not going to do that. But

Katy 43:18
if she was like Yeah, well, we’re really disappointed and you

Alissa 43:23
don’t get to watch me cry on air and fall on YouTube. Okay. But just talking it out and getting out of my head is like I’ve done what I can I know I’m valuable. I’ve

Katy 43:37
had many clients not many I’ve had at least one that I remember specifically who didn’t want to pay me to start with was rude the whole time yelled at me was not happy that I was at closing tried to fire me after we were already under contract and I was the listing agent and I was like, this is now any of this work, sir. And you’re not a nice person and I don’t care and I said And don’t call me back and talk to me like this again. Wow. That’s how bad it was. Okay, do I will talk to your wife do not call me and talk to me this way again. Not gonna happen. What do you say? Just yeah, I think at some point I almost feel like we had to like either like hang up like he was gonna yell at me I’m just like nope, absolutely not gonna happen Yeah, it’s not gonna happen.

Alissa 44:17
Ah for all you know,

Katy 44:20
these people are in the middle of trying not to get divorced someone does have cancer someone their parent is dying anything I they decided their business is going to shut down and they’re not sure how they’re going to pay for this. But they’re stuck in this contract. I don’t know. And

Alissa 44:32
before sent the email saying like, Do you need anything from me? I’m available for these meetings. I was telling myself Alyssa, you always tell people if you’re thinking something, just say it. Yeah, just ask it. But even

Katy 44:44
in the email, you didn’t say, Hey, I don’t feel like I’m doing much to earn this commission. No, I

Alissa 44:48
never said that. My not. I don’t know. Hey,

Katy 44:52
how’s the build process going? You know, I just want to tell you personally, like I know that your husband is very busy and you seem to be a little bit You know, easier to get in touch with? I’m just feeling a little, you know, uncomfortable with the amount of work you’re

Alissa 45:08
I’m doing something the feeling uncomfortable that I’m not working well. But if you’re okay with it, I also don’t want it. I did say that in the email like, I’m used to working. So I’m here to do that. But I also don’t want to overstep. I mean, at this point, they’re just being rude. Well, it doesn’t take much to just communicate. But again, it goes back to that’s not the part we can control. No,

Katy 45:32
I think you should just be like, I’ve done everything I can. I will reach out a couple more times. I will show up to closing and smile. I’ve been to many and uncomfortable closing, haven’t you? Yeah. Where you’re just lying.

Alissa 45:44
Yeah. Be

Katy 45:46
like, give me the check. I’ll be I’ll be out of your hair. Yeah, we’re not going to if your friend if you really truly believe and you have done everything that you can, and he still just doesn’t want you to be involved who like Meyer,

Alissa 46:00
right? That’s their choice. This is on user. I know. Again, you can’t control. So there I did read about some other things that you can do to help you get out of the cycle. Let’s hear it. One is talking it out with someone right. Thanks, Katie. Thanks, everyone listening happier, healthy, happy. Listening to my, my therapy session. Yeah, while I figure out my my thoughts. Oh, wait.

Katy 46:24
While you say speaking of that. Next this show the next week. So actually, not this week. The air? This week

Alissa 46:34
is the Thursday therapy session. Yeah, that muscle humbly community is we’re gonna have therapy.

Katy 46:40
I forgot about together as a group, not with a therapist just with us. It’ll be talking about therapy together. If you’re not in community yet. And you’re like, Man, I really could use someone to talk out this kind of stuff with now’s the time. Yeah. Also time. Yes. Oh, my

Alissa 46:53
gosh, only

Katy 46:54
podcast.com/membership?

Alissa 46:56
Are we still doing an ad? Or should I say what I want to say about that? No,

Katy 46:59
there’ll be an ad episode somewhere. Okay, move on. Okay,

Alissa 47:03
outside of talking it out with either a therapist or friend. He s you have to be mindful of which friends? Are you talking? Yeah.

Katy 47:11
Where are they coming at? And

Alissa 47:12
are they in a positive place to help you or are they going to just feed you more negative and don’t let them help you dig you deeper in a hole? That’s why I knew you were going to be the one to talk to you. Okay, thank you. Thank you. Second thing you could do a journal. That’s good. Yeah, just get it out. Just get it out and get it out with that song. If I get it out on paper. It’ll I don’t know. Is it a country? So no, it’s like a lamest more said, I think, you know, I don’t know about like, her thoughts. If I get them out on paper, they’ll stop threatening the life they belong to?

Katy 47:42
Oh, my God, I don’t know the cell loneliness.

Alissa 47:43
More said Anywho. Carry on. Um, challenge your thoughts? Okay. So say this is what I’m thinking. He finds me invaluable. Are you invaluable? No. Did he tell you in the beginning that he wanted to do this on his own? Yes. Did he tell you from the beginning that as long as it doesn’t cost him anything? He was going to just put you there but he didn’t unnecessarily? Yes, you’re

Katy 48:09
just like an afterthought for him just told me that all in the beginning, like an accessory and he doesn’t care for accessories. So

Alissa 48:15
you have to challenge what the narrative you’re telling your fellow? Why am I saying this? Okay. And then you have to actually confront it, like, pick up the phone, ask the question, say what you’re thinking. If you have a seller that you think is mad at you just call and say you will always feel better after the phone call, even if it’s not the best phone call in the world. Yeah, because you have some answers. You have some closure, right?

Katy 48:45
I have the same thing just confronted head on, right? So if it’s like, in the case of your client buys a house with someone else or less with someone else, and then you like, I’ll read I’ve reached out to many a buyer who ended up buying something else with someone else and be like, Hey, I’m so happy for you. I hope you enjoy your new home. Could you let me know? You know why you chose to go with another agent? Is there something I could have done better? I’m always looking to improve my business. I

Alissa 49:12
love that. I’ve sent that email a few times. I don’t always get a response. But at least you put it out there.

Katy 49:18
I do get a response though. Yeah. And they’re like, oh, no, I really did think you did a great job. My mom was like, you have to use Aunt Sally and I was like, Oh, alright, fine. And I just didn’t even know how to tell you that stuff. Okay,

Alissa 49:31
next story shorter than this. Okay, great. Um, I had a client that I helped them buy their first home. They quickly sold that home like three years later to get something totally different. Okay. Then they wanted to sell that home a few years later so that this is over the course of like eight years, okay. We’ve became friends on social media. You know, I their first house was it took a minute to sell so I was there a lot. I did a lot of open houses. I was spending a lot of time with them. So then when they bought the new house. We went through that together. They told me they were thinking about selling. Okay, so I went over and did a listing presentation and what I thought it was worth. And it went well, I thought, three months later, it’s on the market. And I’m just like, these people

Katy 50:20
that you’ve worked with many times, yeah. And like

Alissa 50:23
we always joked, like, I’m your realtor for life. Like, we’ve been together all this time. And we comment on our stuff with the kids online and what? And then I saw who they listed it with, and I was like, but, but why why on earth? And I didn’t say anything. I ruminated. Oh, man. Okay. So then she posts later, their new house that they bought, okay. And she’s like, this is our forever home, like, oh, like, yeah, right, you know, but she’s like, you know, we’re gonna work. So this is the next chapter of our lives, and we’re gonna renovate this old house and this and that. And so I DM her. And I just said, because I knew I had to write Yeah, I had to. And I just said, the house is so cute. I love that y’all landed back in an older home. And I think I asked I don’t remember how I said it. But I was like, I hope I didn’t do anything wrong in the listing appointment. And she goes, I am so glad you have reached out because I have been feeling so uncomfortable. Like I wanted to reach out to you. But I didn’t know what to say.

Katy 51:33
Like, hey, sorry, I broke your heart. Yes.

Alissa 51:37
She said, I saw this house that we bought, come up on Zillow. And I clicked on that button button that said, like, you know, do you want to see this happen? should just say on it pure evil? Yeah, we want to break up with your realtor, highlight your current agent, yeah, click here. You don’t have to work with them.

Katy 51:59
So she’s helpful,

Alissa 52:00
is so sweet, like, the nicest of people. So they click this button. And this agent is like, I’ll meet you there right now. Like, let’s go just look at it. Like, you don’t need to do anything. Let’s just go look at it. Okay. So she said, you know, we thought that was kind of weird, but we really wanted to see it. So we just drove over. And we loved it. And, you know, we kind of mentioned that we had an agent, and he got pretty upset. And said, well, because I showed you the house first, I have the right to represent you in the transaction. And if you let me represent you in the transaction, I will list your house for X percent, less low, low, low, low. And we were just like, Well, that does make sense. And like this house that we’re buying is a project house and we need all the money all the money we can get him where he just told us that because he showed it to us. We have to buy it with him. Pissed me off, I’ll say so anywho

Katy 53:14
click button to sign here with the devil.

Alissa 53:19
She was asked she was like it just it wasn’t the experience I hoped for You don’t say. So they key close both of them in my the list. It was I knew it wasn’t the price because I thought maybe my price was not what they thought but they listed for the price I gave them so I thought that’s not it. You know, I’m trying in my head. Will

Katy 53:39
you write the name of the agent very small here because I wonder if it’s the same agent from my story?

Alissa 53:43
Yeah, let me I do remember. Yeah, it’ll come back to me. Okay. So, um, anywho. It’s been like, a year and a half. And I get this message from her what? And she’s like, Hey, look, we’re not Raja Yoga right now. But like, this house has a lot of issues. And while we thought it would be fun to renovate, not so fun anymore. The issues that and I’m thinking How was your home inspection? What did you negotiate? I didn’t care. No, they didn’t care at all. So she’s like, it’s just not what we hoped it would be. So if you find anything along these lines, like, we’re just we’re just always kind of looking and like she’s coming back. Obvious. And the point to that as well is don’t burn the bridges. No doubt if you burn the bridges. When you’re in your feelings. It’s gone forever. But if you can stay the bigger person asked the questions, let them know that because even if I hadn’t reached out to say like, Hey, just wanted to make sure we’re okay. She may have never reached out to me again, simply because she’s so nice.

Katy 54:56
That’s happened. Well, that’s the same story as mine. I could have just been like, yeah, I would have been communicating with you on social media because you bought the cutest house ever and didn’t do with me.

Alissa 55:06
And then they don’t feel comfortable reaching out to you, they think you’re mad. But if you’re the one to reach out and be like, Look, you can still talk to me. Yeah. And keep the door open. Because if you plan to be in this business, for your career, they’re going to need to sell that house at some point. Yeah. And they will call like, I cannot I have. So we would need another episode for me to really share all the ways that I was disappointed about something and got in my head and took it personal. Only for it to work out even better later. Yes. But in the moment, it is so hard to remember that and if this person is upset with you mad at you mean to you? It is not just to you, they are probably like that to every person in their life. Oh, all they just talk to you that way. No, but we say he doesn’t like me, right? This isn’t going well because he doesn’t like anyone. Right? And then that’s when you can just let it roll off a little bit more because you’re not taking it personal. Agree.

Katy 56:16
I have one more just confronted head on things you can say. So if your buyer has ghosted you and you don’t know that they bought another house, so you’re just like, yeah, we’re just ghosted me. I’m talking. They’re not saying anything. You can use what we learned and never split the difference, which is, have you given up one me or this or have you? Just that’s it? Hey, have you given up on buying a house? Yeah, that’s it. Don’t say anything else. The other thing is, you can’t say a lot. Just a little but have you give I like that one. It’s like, uh, have you given up I’ve given up on this? This guy? Yes. Shut the absolute front freaking door. It was the same agent for my cute house story. Yeah, yep.

Alissa 57:01
And he has such a terrible reputation. Reputation,

Katy 57:05
but he sure must charm people when he meets them. And then once they sign he’s, I cannot believe it is the same freaking agent. He’s just out there ruining our lives. I can I can No, no, no, no. Right. Greed and referral business there and for no. And for that he just steals people’s clients then when they realize it and then it goes to another one some more new victim, new victim. That’s hilarious for the record, y’all who are listening who aren’t in our market. And if you are in our market, don’t call and ask me. I’m not telling. But there are 4000 agents here. Yeah. For that one the same? Why? I feel so much better. Actually. He must be like a master manipulator. master manipulator. Yeah, there’s no other way. Okay, Larry, I also like to say you, you use this in your life and other ways, not just with your clients. Like when you look at someone else’s feed or their social media, and you start comparing yourself, you tell yourself a story about that person, based on what is out there. Oh, their business is perfect. Their life is perfect. You do not know all the facets of anyone, you hardly know all the facets of yourself. Correct, which is why therapy’s so helpful. Join us Thursday, but like, right, so join us on Thursday. Also, when we were preparing for this episode, we talked about that meme, you know, the meme, where the man it’s a cartoon, and the man and the woman, the husband and wife are laying in bed. And they’re like back to back. Like they’re facing opposite ways. Kind of like they’re mad at each other. Right? Yeah. And the wife says her, he’s probably thinking about other women him if two people on opposite sides of the world simultaneously drop a piece of bread than the Earth briefly becomes a sandwich. Oh, that was the best one but they have a million versions. million.

Alissa 59:03
world could be a sandwich. But

Katy 59:05
the truth is, you’re like you’re filling in the blanks. And sometimes the other people aren’t thinking about you at all at all. They care less, don’t care if you’re happy, sad, angry, they do. They just don’t even you don’t cross their mind. Nobody thinks about you as much as you. And that’s totally fair. But you can’t put those thoughts into their head, like from your head. Like you’ve just got this is

Alissa 59:31
also the importance of pruning your database and build your own business. We do talk there’s a whole module in there about the importance of letting people go from your database. Yeah. I went through this a lot when I was a Dave Ramsey endorsed realtor because you know, you have to follow they that was like the online lead. Yeah, read that source. Sure. And they would build and grow and the list will get longer and longer, but I wasn’t always getting responses, right? And I had a few things that I said to that would get a response like, Hey, if you no longer need my services, just let me know, I’d be happy to take you off my list, right? Or, Hey, I’m updating my file. Yeah, I have in my file that you were looking to buy in this area. Is that still true? Once I just started giving them permission to say, No, I actually don’t need you anymore. They would respond. Right? Right, right. If I would beat around the bush and be like, hey,

Katy 1:00:29
just try to hang on to them. Yeah, just check here. Will you buy your home? Yeah. Have

Alissa 1:00:35
you seen anything lately? I’m still searching. I’m here. I’m ready for you. Yeah. That never got a response.

Katy 1:00:42
No, you just be like, Hey, have you given up? Have

Alissa 1:00:45
you given up on this? Then they respond and say, yeah, and sometimes they would be like, Hey, I ended up buying the house I was renting. Hey, I ended up buying my mom’s house. Hey, my aunt’s actually a realtor like I got real responses and the closure really great. I don’t need you on the live. And the more I was pruning, yeah, the happier I got right. And then I’d be like, You know what, this is my last email. And then I’m never going to email this person again. Because I have followed up with them. Do you any help

Katy 1:01:14
them that in the email, this is the last time I’m going to reach out or I’m going to remove you from the list. Just wanted to check in one last time before I remove you from my way.

Alissa 1:01:21
Use that verbiage a few times? Yes. And it’s like, I think to saying like, I’m going through my files reminded them like I’m a business. Yeah, I’m trying to keep track of you. I’m trying to help you. Do you not want my help? Good. I can remove your file if you right. And sometimes they would respond and just say you can remove my file. Right? Oh, answer just fine. Great. Thank you. And I would always respond and be like, I just want to say thank you for responding. Yes, because it allows me to do my job and help someone else. So thank you. Great. And I mean, that truly, thank you. Thank you. This was great. So great to go make some phone calls.

Katy 1:01:59
I can’t wait to hear what your lady says because that dude is never gonna dog Are you? Okay, are we ready for a toast? Do

Alissa 1:02:07
you remember your heart and he’s just not that into you? Probably. Let’s talk about it when she’s talking to Drew Barrymore. And she’s trying to tell her like, you know, he didn’t call and she’s like, well, maybe his grandma died. I probably use this analogy before you finish it. I know that she’s like, you know, maybe he’s out of town or his grandma died.

Katy 1:02:28
He’s a realtor. His job is to be in town.

Alissa 1:02:31
She’s think she her narratives in that movie are just so good way spinning of why so and so’s not calling her back. Right? Same thing while he’s still interested. Yeah, he’s still interested. And then the guy friend is like, Nope, just I’m just adding to you not into it not into you. The simplest answer is usually the answer. And then she was so free. Right? She was like, Oh, he just doesn’t like me. I removal and wow, freeing,

Katy 1:03:01
right? Because being stuck and tied to that stress. The problem right now is that you it’s the new construction house. So it’s just dragging on and on. That’s the prep ends with the paycheck. Probably just

Alissa 1:03:15
start looking at the bright side.

Katy 1:03:17
Be like you know what, you just wanted me to look at you like a paycheck.

Alissa 1:03:20
Fine. Well, fine.

Katy 1:03:22
I tried to work you didn’t want me to this is what you wanted.

Alissa 1:03:27
I’ll give it to you.

Katy 1:03:29
And you’d probably be happy about it. And thank you for letting me be involved in take the friend out to dinner. Yeah. Thank you so much for referring your debt. Yeah,

Alissa 1:03:37
he’s something

Katy 1:03:43
Okay, are we ready for a toast? Okay, well, here’s a toast from our friends at the nor next conference. Okay, great. Hey, bye, y’all. Hey,

Speaker 1 1:03:51
y’all. I’m Laura Lee Smith with the life on the Brazzers group in College Station, Texas. Today I am toasting my buyer’s agent and showing specialists Naomi Smith, who has now turned into my best friend biggest cheerleader confidant, and my Girl Friday anytime I need something with work with personal she is always there and she has helped my business grow tremendously having her on my side. The cheers, Naomi, I love you. Thank

Alissa 1:04:16
you so much for tuning in to the hustle humbly podcast.

Katy 1:04:19
If you enjoy this episode, please go to rate this podcast.com/hustle humbly and leave us a review or drop a comment if you’re listening on Spotify. If you

Alissa 1:04:27
have an episode topic or someone you’d like to toast on the show, please email us at team at hustle humbly podcast.com Find

Katy 1:04:34
us on social media at hustle humbly podcast. Don’t forget to find all of the free resources at hustle humbly podcast.com/resources See you next week.